News

Blog Menu

Adversity...Paving the Way

Posted by Hans Hanson

"Adversity paves the way for personal growth." - Bernardo

My USAF story- the day was March 3rd, 1976. I arrived on a flight in San Antonio at 9:00 pm. I boarded a bus and was shuttled to Lackland AFB. By 11:00, my head was shaven. I was soon introduced to my Squadron Commander along with 47 other newly enlisted members of the Air Force.

We were awakened at 5:30 am by bright lights. The Commander told us that we had 30 minutes to shower up, 48 of us for 6 showers. At 6:00 am, we had all showered-up.

He comes in and yells- "You got my showers wet!"

Oh, how was that not going to happen?

An hour later, I lined up for breakfast and was served 2 pancakes. At the end of the line, I added my usual dose of syrup. Suddenly, I received a jab into my side. It was the Commander.

"Hanson, you wouldn't be fat if you didn't use so much syrup!" I was 6'1", 185 #'s that day...not fat!

Nothing we did was going to be right for a while. My perspective was disrupted with a massive injection of Adversity.

I was raised in Weston, CT, a quiet town, secluded from the rest of the world. All I had to worry about was my next golf match or basketball game. Aside from being turned down by a few girls for dates, I hadn't faced any real adversity in life.

Meet Bernardo, one of my brilliant-minded students from Ecuador.

A few days ago, we were chatting away like we do, and Bernardo suddenly said to me-

"If adversity hasn't been forced into you, then force it into yourself."

Wow, that's the moment I realized that joining the USAF in 1976 was my way of forcing adversity into myself at a time in which it hadn't yet been forced into me.

If adversity hasn't been forced into you, then force it into yourself...is a brilliant power-point!

Bernardo went on to say-

"Adversity is imposing something unpleasant onto myself. It's only when I got used to doing unpleasant things that I became a much better person. The action of just doing it makes me grow."

Just great, I'll leave it at that...thank you Bernardo!

In reflecting back over 46 years, my greatest growth spurt began the night of March 3rd, 1976.

Go shave your head...Adversity!

Done!

Posted by Hans Hanson

Getting things done is a mindset of people referred to as "doers".

There are talkers and there are doers. The college process, and life in general, rewards the doers. I think that we can all agree to that, right?

The problem is that too few people are legitimate doers. I'm fortunate to work with many "doers". Meet one of them, who I'll refer to as UT, from India.

UT and his family came to me recently for the purpose of submitting applications to excellent universities having top Swim teams.

With several colleges to search, essays to write, recruiting memos to initiate, and applications to get ready, there was daily work to be done with meetings extending late into the night, a factor of UT not getting home from Swim practice until 8:00 pm.

We worked together closely for 2 - 3 weeks. Each time, we ended the meeting with me giving UT a to-do list, all things necessary to keep things moving forward.

Note that UT is in the pool each morning at 5:30 am to begin his morning training.

Upon reviewing each item on the to-do list, UT would think about it for a moment and then reply- "Done"... indicating his intention to get it done.

In every situation, when we regrouped the following night, UT's task list was done. I could count on it 100%.

Now a month later, we have colleges decided upon, essays written, applications submitted, recruiting memos sent, and applicant portals created-

Done!

Great job UT!!!

Inside the Box

Posted by Hans Hanson

"We need to think inside-the-box because that's where we tap into our pure potential"- Maria J.

Here are a few excerpts from the college essay of one of my brilliant Ecuadorian students- Maria J.

"Thinking outside of the box is backwards!"

As I sit in on small-business networking groups, I often hear- "Think outside the box."

I've always thought that to be a bit silly, but I really didn't understand how so until Maria explained it so clearly in her essay.

In her excellent college essay, Maria explains-

"We need to think inside-the-box because that's where we tap into our pure potential."

"The proverbial box itself is my protective layer-of-skin. Its contents are my thoughts, emotions, desires, vision, values, perspectives, experiences...where my internal potential gives rise to infinite possibilities."

"Inside the box is where I can dream, visualize, intellectualize, and emotionalize. It's where I can turn my desires into reality."

Moms, Dads, and students across the planet, this is brilliant. I suggest that we all spend a little more time, maybe a lot more time, thinking inside the box!!!

Thank you dear Maria J!

Every Parent's Internal Secret

Posted by Hans Hanson

Every parent's internal secret that we all live with forever is-

Did we get it right when it counted most...college that is!

Not college for us, ha, my college career spanned a few years with a 5-year stint with the USAF stuck in the middle of it. I graduated as a 27-year-old.

I went to work right away in Public Accounting and had my CPA secured soon thereafter. I think things worked out well. At least my Mom always thought so.

However, Mom felt a sense of need to apologize to me 20 years later for not doing enough to help me get college right. She felt that she needed to apologize to once and finally get the burden off her shoulders. Can you imagine that?

Much of that inspired me to do this work. Sure, I do it expressly to help kids live the life they want for themselves. But I also knew clearly that I can help parents get college right for their kids, living without the burden of their mistakes made when their kids needed them most to be on top of their game.

We all live quietly everyday with the internal secret of knowing whether we got it right or not.

While parents can fake it outwardly to the rest of the world, no one can fake it internally. Either you got it right or you didn't. There's no middle ground.

For those who get it right, they live forever being freed of the guilt that comes with getting it wrong.

You see, getting college right is definitely centered on your child's interests, but it has lifelong ramifications on parents.

And just to be sure, a last minute scramble to drop off the child at a so-called "elite" college doesn't constitute getting it right.

Paying $75,000 for an overpriced college doesn't constitute getting it right.

Making a FB post proclaiming how proud you are of your child doesn't constitute getting it right.

To rely on the school's Guidance/ College Counselor along with their Naviance "scatter-gram" college selection approach does not constitute getting it right.

Randomly applying to high-ranked schools with incomplete applications and horrible essays does not constitute getting it right.

Just getting applications submitted under the deadline with no follow-up or follow-through does not constitute getting it right.

This process cannot be an overnight effort. It can't be an after-thought. Rather it's a long time in the works.

I'm reminded of this every morning, including this morning when a parent announced to me that "We talked and we're ready to submit ED to Miami."

Months have gone into that decision...trips, airline tickets, hotels, visiting colleges, meeting counselors, building credentials, writing essays...the list goes on.

All that work results in exploration, self-discovery, and realizations, the things required to get college right.

Psychological Blindness and Fish

Posted by Hans Hanson

Psychological blindness is predicated upon people not wanting to bring something into their awareness.

Quick disclaimer...I am not a Psychologist. I more resemble a Bassist than a Psychologist, ha! I know a few Bass-lines and I know how this term applies to colleges in how they gain emotional-mastery over student-families.

Another disclaimer...I'm not bashing the colleges, rather, it's their business and they're great at it. I just want to awaken parents to the traps involved, aka- the hooks. Without further delay...

By tapping into the Psychological Blindness of many parents, colleges have become masters at manipulating adult behavior. Over the past 10 years, they've programmed "hooks" into their College Tours and Information Sessions designed to draw in the emotional interest of parents and their kids. Beware, that's market-manipulation at its best, a market owned by the colleges, driven by the parents.

Hooks for the parents, the market-makers:

• We have a 90% job-placement rate

• Your child doesn't have to know their major yet...we'll help them figure it out.

• We'll meet your financial-need at 100%

Hooks for the kids, the pawns in the game:

• You don't have to know your major yet...we'll help you figure it out

• We are test-optional

• Come see our beautiful new dorms

• Come see our amazing new cafeteria's

Parents jump onboard, kids jump on board, the psychological-hook is set.

Next come Financial Award Packages high in cost, low in awards, high in loans...high in anxiety!

Parents will often say-

• We'll do anything for our child, they deserve it.

• We'll find a way to pay.

• We owe it to them.

Kids often say-

• I love it.

• It's where I want to go.

• Please mom...or dad...

The hooks are set, the fish are being reeled in.

When student-families fall into this emotional trap, they drive the market- price upward. They become the market-makers. On that note, we can't blame the colleges. They are merely running their business with precision controls and influences.

They are doing what the market allows. The result?

We will soon have our first $100,000 per year cost of a college. Many more will follow suit thereafter.

Cost has doubled over the past 12 years or so. Many colleges have eliminated scholarship awards.

Student-families make many costly mistakes, not just in terms of dollars, but also in terms of the college experience and desired outcomes.

To their extraordinary success, colleges monetize the emotional-addiction that parents have for their children. I understand. I was one of them!

In the end, it's up to the parents to not fall for this trap. It's up to parents to be more savvy to what they are about to buy—COLLEGE.

Don't be a fish!

Do not fall for the illusion that colleges create for you. They don't have a 90% job-placement rate...none of them do!

Do not turn it over to your child to manage. They can't manage buying a home, a car, or a $300,000 college!

Do not think that your school's Guidance Counselor will help make sure that you're on top of your game. It's not their job, not their child, not their money.

Do get on top of your game. Be knowledgeable, be involved. Your child depends on you now more than ever before.

The stakes are too big to wait on being involved. The results are too predictable to not be on top of your game. The cost of getting it wrong will be felt forever.

Don't be a fish!